The Journey Heart

Asheville, North Carolina is where my sister, Susan, lives.  It is a four-hour drive so we don’t get up there often.  We love to go see my sister and her son, Eldridge and sit on their back deck eat, discuss life and love.  We also like to go into the small town of Asheville and visit all their art galleries.  Asheville is the home of many craftsmen. 

Last time we went I came across this heart and saying.  It spoke to me and I bought a few and have it in my little blogging closet sitting on the shelf to remind me about what this journey is all about.  The heart is not pretty, it is rough, looks a little battered but the spiral in the middle draws your eyes away from the ugliness and makes you look a little deeper.

The Journey Heart

The card that  came with it reads:

The most ancient of all symbols, the spiral honors life, growth, and the soul’s journey.  Each turn brings us nearer to our center and to a higher level of spirituality and connection to our Creator.  May your journey be light.

There are few that I know that their journey is always light.    I have enjoyed the light times in my journey but know that in order to have a beautiful Spring you must have Fall and a very cold Winter.   This last Summer seemed like a very bad Winter in some areas of my life.  The sun would occasional shoot out and give me hope of Spring.  It is still Winter for me but I feel renewed hope that Spring is coming.  I got a large warm ray of  hope this morning.  

 One thing I have learned with age, don’t let the Winter in one area of your life take over and cloud all of your life.  I am so blessed with joy and peace because I can see the whole picture.

(The definition of hope:  the feeling that what is wanted can be had or that events will turn out for the best)

May your day be filled with hope as you travel on your journey.

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Eating a whale

My father always likes to say, “You can eat an entire whale,  one bite at a time”.   His statement came to mind the other day as I was driving to the gym at 5:00 a.m.  I realized I had come to  a totally different places in my life  physically and emotionally.

For many years I had a lot of self destructive thoughts and behaviors, lack of confidence and poor self esteem.  I lived with depression for 20 years and formed many bad habits.  Changing the thoughts and behaviors has been a five year process and will continue for the rest of my life.

Five years ago when I would think about going to the gym I would spend half the day talking myself there.   Even though I was seeing the benefits and feeling better I would think of every excuse why I could not make it.  There was a real battle going on in my head.  Most days I would say, “Just go and do cardio for 10 minutes and then you can leave.”  I would agree to this (begrudgingly) but go and get started and end up doing the prescribed 45 minutes.  I was exhausted from the battle but proud I had won.  This went on for over a year and then one day I realized I was battling myself  less and less.  I just got my gym bag ready and was looking forward to getting to the gym.  I started grinning because I realized something in me had changed.   It took over a year to change the  way I had lived my life and the bad tapes that were running around in my head and running my life.  I think part of the problem was that I was afraid of another failure and I was afraid of success but that is another post.

Last year I had a tough year physically.  I could hardly exercise and I gained weight.  January the doctor gave me clearance to start exercise.  I was cautiosoulsy excited.  I wanted my body back but some of my old fear of failure taunted me.  This time I had four years of success under my belt, I had knowledge and I believed down deep I could do it.  I wanted to try my new way of thinking that I tell my clients every day.  I did not want to be extreme in my eating or exercise.  I wanted to eat moderately and exercise regulary and see what would  happened.

Well, it has been three and a half months of  doing what I tell others.  Truthfully, I have so wanted to be extreme and exercise like a crazy person and monitor every thing I put in my mouth but have been determined to exercise and eat moderately and enjoy each day.    It is working, not only is my body changing SLOWLY  but I am gaining an inner confidence that taking care of my body, mind and spirit is for life.  I believe in the healthy part of myself.

My old trainer, David Suri,  used to tell me, “Ruth, don’t be afraid, you are never going back.”  I did not believe him,  I had yo-yo dieted for 2o years, but I trusted him, so I kept coming back until the way I thought about food, exercise and my healthy became mine.  My trainer  fed me peices of a healthy whale until I was strong enough to feed myself.  Over a 20 year period I ate a whale that produced a depressed, self destructive, and morbidly obese woman.  Over the last five years I have been eating a whale that is producing a healthy mind, body and spirit.   I feel I am becoming who I was always meant to be, one bite at a time.

It is one day at a time of healthy choices, exercising, eating right, loving ourselves and changing the way we think that is going to produce a beautiful, confident, self loving and healthy people inside and out!

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New beginnings

I am so excited about this new blog.  I so want to live a healthy life and want to learn  what works for you.  I truly believe being healthy starts in our mind and spirit and seeps out to our physical body.  When my mind is thinking clearly and my spirit is charged up I stand taller, I have more confidence, I eat healthier and I want to move.  When I allow negative thoughts to bombard my mind everything seems hopeless, I want to stuff my feelings and cannot make myself get to the gym.

Being balanced is a focus in my own life and I am encouraging my clients to find out what balanced means to them.  Balanced eating and exercise look different at all ages.    Finding what works for you and sharing it will inspire others.  Each week we will explore different areas that we can be balanced in and live a healthy life.

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